Temple of the Dark Moon

TEE TEE TEE TEE TEE TEE, TEE TEE TEE TEE TEE TEE…. argh, why do this has to happen when i only flet like i slept for an hour or so…. it was so nice…and it was a dreamless sleep…i can hardly get one these days. ‘ah, but i cant be late’ i thought to myself…’bah, im never late anyways…’. after having fumbling in the dark for the switch to turn off my charger and grabbed that irritating ringing piece of artifact…put in snooze mode and ‘flump’ im back to my comfy sleeping position. and for the first time in history (ok… minus the first week of IT) i only got through one snooze and woke up. dragged those lead weighted legs and reluctantly moved to the door and begin my everyday routine of morning hygiene.

well, i donno if ur lecturers that visit you have their own transport or not, but mine din exactly has his own transport… so being the kind hearted person that she is, she decided to give him a lift from his hotel to our very own POD. have to drive him from awana la~~ so by 7.20 we already kuar rumah to go to awana kijal to find him. fate has it that my bowels have to start moving at this time of the day…haish, so embarrasingly i have to make the lecturer wait for a while i answer natures call…god, why in the world does it have to come at such inappropriate times…well, at least they have very nice washrooms..hahahahaa.

anyways, having provided our lecturer a mode of transport is definitely a very good move, cause he was very happy with that..hahahaha. anyways… donno why, but it seems some students in some other plants have some trouble giving him directions on how to go to their plants… so he was .. erm.. well, u can imagine urself. anyways… after being inputted with such ‘information’, we said ‘oh look, we have sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much time left, its ok, lets explore the place shall we?’ so we brought him further up and around to find his ‘missing targets’. ah, i guess that give a plus 5 point…hehehehehe. AND as always, being as nice as we are, we decided to drive him up to his intended destination tomolo too and then drive him back to awana. aih, such angels, we do u find anymore?? HHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. seriously, we have no other intention except to be horribly angelic..huahuahua. anyways, not that i mind… cause im not the one driving ..hehe.

hmm, oh yes… so anways, the morning session was ok… nothing special interviewed everyone bla bla bla…everyone got good for their remarks and stuff..ahahhaah… well, naturally naturally. no body would really say bad or horrible even if they wanted to. and being in petronas…its usually pretty unusual if there are no food around. so when there were none, i was wondering where the heck did all the food go? mana tau, rupe2 nye…they put outside of the room and it was in such a secluded area that no one saw it and the food planned for 10 ended up eaten by 2 and yes u guessed it…me and yin ping…prof is a vegetarian…no tak makan..haha.

so prof wanted to have a tour in the plant which was suppose to be 11 oclock and being malaysians as we are…. we went at 12 pm… can u imagine..just when the #&*)@$!#@#$% sun was at its peak of the day~! fuh, we spent an hour going through all the units in the plant cause he wanna know more aobut the plant and stuff… thank god we had zulkafri and the rest to guide cause personally, i donno a dingy thing about the plant layout so i also donno where to bring him..hahaha.sorrylah…these are what we call, office engineers..HEHEHEHEHE. it was seriously in sahara man…with the sun on ur back…all of us sweating like pigs~~ prof is the worse la, he dah lah wear one t shirt inside and uniform summore have to wear cover all (this type of clothes will send versace or gucci vomitting blood) so end up 3 pieces of clothes, walking under a 12 oclock sun..hahaha. alot of questions asked in which im sure i cannot answer but thank god zulkafri and the gang was there to coverup my abysmal Process Knowledge.

and so begins his presentation and stuff regarding his ideas for project and so on and stuff…my usually cheerful sv, my sv’s boss and my sv’s boss’s boss somehow, lost touch with the cheerfulness i should say…hehehehe. well, not that i din expect that..but then again, such a difference from their normal day to day grins and smiles. u have no idea how embarssing it felt to be ‘praised’ over and over and over again that both of us are ‘very good students’, ‘one of the BEST students’ all day long… i don even know where to even hide my face. if UTP ppl ever heard of this they would be laughing their asses off…sighs… and for the record, both our names are ‘famous’ in the HR department and TES department. even during the first day itself when we introduced ourselves they went..’ ooooooo… so this the famous chin and ping’… aduh, both of us ‘huh?.famous for what? i don even know you’…then comes the truth…’both of u caused quite a fuss for us HR ppl u know…even ESU also tau lu org punya nama’. if im an animated anime, right now there would be scribblings for my eyes with mouth hanging wide open, shrunk into 5 year old size, having a seizure like shiver, bluish purple colour for half my face and a very big drop of sweat right above my head.

i wanted to write more about the proceedings..but then its a little sensitive..well, im pretty sure no one from pgb will ever come across this or even bother to read if they did… but then again, prevention is better than cure eh… don wanna cause more trouble for myself than i have already caused. hmm…nothing to write anymore i guess…

silkroad, not exactly that one in China that link to god knows where..u tell me. i donno much about Chinese History so cant blame me~ hehehe. www.silkroadonline.net is just an online game i’ve picked up when i was stuck here… i kinda played that game for like 3 weeks i think… kinda stupid actually online games… even i who played it cannot see the point of it. i just literally walk around whacking creatures over and over and over again with nothing to gain except lvling up and it qualifies me to wear new ‘garments’ that are more… err …gaya compared to my older levels and wield more powerful weapons to inflict higher damage…which basically does not really matter for u see, the more powerful u are, the better weapons of course u can use, but then again, the monsters life increase by that much of the amount…so u actually spend the same amount of slashes to kill a high level monster compared to when u are wielding low level weapons to kill low level monsters. i wouldnt bother playing an online game if i got anything better to do like Civilization 4 or Fable or Black and White 2 but then my comp is actually ‘obsolete’ to even run these high end games that i have been dying to play since last sem… so anyways, having absolutely nothing to do after office hours, i succumbed myself to online game silk road, slashing and whacking with my zombie girl character (she’s a typical chinese zombie with a talisman sticking to her forehead and eyes closed). anyways…having pain stakingly lvlling up this baby up to lvl 36 (by now, the experience points needed to advance her lvl is 2.9 million and all im getting from one pathetic monster is 900… so u can imagine how many of those same bloody monsters i have to kill to even get to level 37), some how along they way of upgrading my weapon i manage to destroy it into bits… well not exactly…more precisely, i reduced its ‘power’. so for me after spending a million bucks trying to upgrade it, it remained as it is.. junk. that was the line… i’m just too lazy to bother even to go on slashing monsters again and again after being so ‘unfairly’ (these games have an upgrading system that is so wonderful..50% success and 50% failure in which ur item maybe destroyed) treated, further more, with a junk of an item. i just quited that programme and straigh away deleted it from my comp. ah, there it goes… no more mindless slashing of monsters.

if truth be told, i have played a number of these games…always at the recommendatioin of my brother and it always happens during sem breaks… the 2 months break we have. and the funniest thing is, every god damned online game is almost similar…all have the same kind of choice… warrior, mage, ranger, priest being the exception is silkroad which is the one of the reason i decided to try it.  and everytime i play any online game, i will always choose to be a mage…what to do..i just love magic. and being a typical gamer… i knew what kind of abilities these mages of all the online games have…they have 3 elements to choose from fire, ice, and lightning. always the same…ice will slow the enemy, fire will burn the enemy..lightning donno what it does cause i never really used it. ice will always have frost armour…so typical. anyways… i will always play a character until its level 40++ then get fed up of it..cause i see the same spells and animation again and again for so long..hahahha. when i look back at all that… i have always wondered why in the world does an online game have so many players? because even until now, i cannot see the point. i played silkroad cause i have nothing to do here. i played online games back home cause i cant do anything else…cept painting..but that one only one of the hols..then donno why after that din continue…i think because go india and bangkok then now IT dy thats why.

and so by abandoning silkroad, i have wow~! a whole day of free time… no malls to go to, well, theres the sea… but i don feel like swimming in a horribly murky sea… anyways… no pool to go (i don go in klang cause its horribly dirty. can go shah alam one but donno road…and it’s an indoor pool which means the water is super cold in the morning. went there few times but always freeze to death), no story books to read..i doubt the amount of story books can last me another 5 more months… cant paint (tot i would be very busy when working..yeah right)… so now, without the online game… im stuck with donno what to do. i think i will ask around if anyone knows kerteh got sell oil painting stuff… at least then i can do something about the time i have in my god damned hands. i could write poems again…but then i have wrote so much in that 3 days, i donno what to write summore… have to leave for sometime for more observatioins and ideas to pop up and then only can write again…hehehehe.

aih, i totally regret never upgrade my comp before i come here~~~~ god its stifling hot in my room every afternoon~!

This is rubbish,
Absolutely rubbish,
3 days I’m here,
without work what so ever.

Too much work gives a person stress,
Absolutely no work makes me fee like I’m a pest!
If I’m to choose which is the best,
Give me some stress so I won’t be such a mess!

Write this rhyme I have continued,
Because yesterday’s work was not so good,
Rhyme it should, yet some did not,
At the very least that’s what I thought.

Bored stiff yes I am,
What has became of that man?
13th he says he shall return,
I’m rotting still into oblivion.

Ticketie tock, ticketie tock,
There goes the long hand of the clock,
The work I have now is actually naught,
What the hell am I going to write for my report?

Hit the books I should probably do,
Then I can show that I’m busy too.
Technical books can be such a bore,
I wish it’s Thursday so I can go by four!

The thought that should never had,
Crossed my mind in a fleeting moment,
Unbeknownst to me,
There lay the seed in which it grows.

The thought that should never had,
Grew to a sapling,
Nourished by light and whispers of gentle,
Hardly making a difference in the vast ruins.

The thought that should never had,
Grew to a great tree,
To which i took shelter when it rains,
To which i look for shade when it’s hot.

The Great Tree of Green,
Standing still in the midst of waste,
Neither wind or lightning could ever break,
Its roots deep and strong.

The thought that should never had,
Caught me by surprise,
Multitude of saplings dotted the landscape,
Each crushing the ruins into Dust.

Even as I salvaged the blocks of old,
Sirens of the Trees held my senses,
Entranced by their soft whispers,
The thought that should never had.

Pink flowers bloomed atop the Great Green,
Flowers which i can only see,
But never hope to reach,
Birds above chirpping mockingly at me.

I lay below patiently waiting,
For a petal to fall from the Tree,
I lay below patiently waiting,
No petal came falling down to me.

The thought that should never had,
Crossed my mind in a fleeting moment,
Unbeknownst to me,
It brought both joy and pain.

What use to a gardener,
Whose plants turns its rewards away from him?
A child who forgets its parents,
Is a child not needed.

Unbeknownst to me,
The bitter truth of parenthood,
knows no boundry of betrayal,
until uttered from lips of their child.

The thought that should never had,
stayed in the Great Eden of Green,
I headed for the Northern Winds,
In which no green could ever dream to reach.

Three more hours before five,
Why not write something that can rhyme?
So now my creative juices are about to flow,
Pass your judgement and let me know!

A little officce in the white building,
But due to poor air conditioning,
There are times when it is frigid,
There are times when it is not.

At the corner here I sit,
Secluded, invisible and hardly seen!
A week was given for a task,
In less than two days I’ve finished it up!

So much time with nothing to do,
Why not play a game of Pikachu?
A thousand times I’ve played that game,
Until now I feel it’s a little lame.

Three months has come to pass,
My oh my, time ticked really fast,
In a way I’m glad it did,
A place without Malls will be the death of me!

The next 3 erm…u can call it poems kot…donno la…thats what i intended to write at first anyways…hahahaha… these are written in the space of 7 hours which i have nothing to do…i had always done this during year one but somehow stopped… i was really encouraged to write when hoong chuin actually wanted one of my written poems to stick in his room…so anyways..here goes.

There Has been a Death

Morning dew drips from the daisies,
Facing low burdened by its weight,
Figures in Black drifting back and forth,
Wore signs of statues ages past.

Silence embraces the damp stone walls,
Craved in the image of the High Heavens,
Obscured by the growth of moss,
Below lay the silent face in Eternal Slumber

Pretty red flowers of Nightshade,
Laid in abundance by its dearests,
Roses lay forgotten on the benches,
The little wooden box carried away.

Figure in robe of purple and black,
Sings of the deathless hymns,
Brushes the ears of those six feet under,
For those who breathes to hear.

The last pile of dirt entombs,
Sealing the innocent face within,
Those who Die brings forth Birth,
Yours brought forth Mine.

The wry smile of a man,
Whispered thanks in silence,
Melts into the darkness from which he came,
One Black Rose lay on the marble tomb.

Even if you embrace me until it suffocates,
We will never become one.
In a place deeper than gentleness
Touching each other is merely pain.
Please bind the two of us.
We can no longer dream,
Joining hands in uncertainty,
Walking towards
The Cruel Dawn.

True words are surely
Somewhere in the real world,
Lurking
In our wordless night.
Surely even now

Meeting each other in order to know loneliness,
We won’t know until we exchange a kiss.
Even so, I am trembling with joy
Of having met you.
Please support my heart.
We can no longer dream,
We can’t run to a warm place.
We will surely overcome
The Cruel Dawn.
In the abandoned silence
Will surely find
The true words
In order to lovingly hurt each other.
Someday surely

Even if you embrace me until it suffocates,
We will never become one.
The Cold that starts before dawn,
Please shine upon
The Path that’s just for us.

Ending Theme for ‘Loveless’ — Michiyuki (The Path)

the title says it all, ZZZZZZZZZZZZ. seriously, i thought i would be able to blog a lot more here considering i am working and stuff… but i dont know…some how things just turns to ‘teeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee’. no other sounds can be heard. i cant seem to recall anything relatively interesting to write about…heck, maybe there wasnt any in the first place~! life here has been an all time low~~~~ week 13 has started…

for a note, i will always be a loyal friendster blogger…malas la wanna change blog here and there…hahahaahah… not like i use any other features other than its publishing capabilities. wow..i think this is one fo my shortest blogs ever..but then again, quite alot for a nothing much to say blog..hehehe

Fate has it that i am to teach 2 standard 5 kids english and bahasa malaysia. i guess i jumped at the chance because of the $$$, not really because i love teaching or i love educating the young. (so i guess its kind of a wrong intention?) anyways, i really have no idea what standard ppl learn…. after all, it has been like what… 10 years ago? how am i suppose to remember what i was like then anyways… i only remember not doing my homework, being forced to sit in the front because i was horribly noisy, i think my teacher even switch the person sitting beside me because both of us are goofers and we cant stop laughing and we keep cracking jokes… enough was enough i guess. i think the teacher even had a long … i think it was kinda of a ply wood, those one ince wide kinda wood we normally use for KH for ‘disciplinary’ correction tool. man it was painful i can tell ya that… after all, what does a noisy and lazy student usually get eh? best part was, she never hit the palm, but your knuckles… so imagine that…by today’s standard it would be considered abuse.. HAHAHHA. but of course, wouldnt dream of the world of telling mom and dad, instead of sympathy, im sure i would get more spanking… so everytime the question of how’s school will be answered with the automatic…good.

so anyways, being the nearly entirely english speaking me, i was to tutor mandarin speaking them. at first i thought it shouldnt be much of a problem, i mean basic chinese i can still cover… after all, how hard can standard five english or bm be??? aih, woe was on me for having such clouded views of the standard five english. or rather, their level of understanding. i expected english to be well quite frankly… bad. but i never thought i would that so bad~~!! :S

they can hardly string two words together to form a complete sentence… basic english is totally out of the window… and i dah la don remember the nouns and adjectives and all the rules… im absolutely horrible at that. maybe its because me mam keep reminding me what words to use and what not to and its just kinda automatically stuck to the brain, i don care what is a noun or adjective… it if sounds right then should be right la…HAHAHAHAHHAA. so insteand of going by my own pace, i just use their work books…hehehe. just last week i was teaching them err, many, much, any, a few, and the likes… all those are rather easy to cover except for any. i really cannot think of any explaination to any. the dictionary just says, it can be used as a determiner, pronoun, or adverb… sighs, those words have long been eroded from my brains and was replaced by nilaohia, gomen nasai, sou desu ka and the likes. as i explained away, my heart sank into the bottom of my stomach as i look at their small little confused faces… sighs. so this is how a teacher feels when their student cannot understand a word they are saying… god really wants me to feel nearly all feelings doesnt he/she. ok ok, i get the picture… i shall ‘try’ my best not to label lecturers dumb or donno how to teach (directed to god).

nyways, other than that, i have to actually use the chinese-malay-english dictionary to find those words which they don understand and make them read the chinese translations (since its no surprise i cant read mandarin no more) hoping that they can get some idea based on the mandarin explanation it has. so far has been effective, but i guess it has eroded my reputation as a teacher…hahahahaha.

seriously i donno how much help i am to them, english i can still do quite something, but bm is a little hard. i donno what to help them at actually. just ask them to write karangan. i am trying to train them so that they can write more interstingly. explain more and stuff… maybe i am expecting too much from the 11 year olds? 2 weeks down, lets see… 20 more weeks to go. and extra 100 smackeroos for me every month if they decide to keep me. hahahaha.